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Here on Reel From The Real, i write what i’ve learned in investing x personal finance.
My goal is to:
share optimistic and positive energy - because the hustle is real x rough enough
personalise personal finance that bit more.
😎 To your wealth,
Aila Obiocha
In part 1, I talked about how I realised that my super broke self was destined to be just that - broke. In case you missed it, you can read it here
Today, I want to talk about the beauty of negative fuel. I think, as humans, we are used to feeling good when we do good things.
A friend once told me that the only thing preventing him from saving money was the feeling that he was depriving himself. Saving felt like punishment, and as far as he was concerned, he hadn’t done anything wrong by working hard for his salary.
This is why Motivation is so much more attractive than Discipline. We want to feel good when we’re doing good things, like working hard to secure ourselves and our families.
But sometimes, that bad feeling is all there is. When you are drowning in the truth of your finances, in the real, unspeakable truth of the barrenness of all that hard work, study, effort and enthusiasm, sometimes Disappointment is all there is. Frustration. Despair. Shame. Anger.
Looking back on my own journey, here’s what I know now.
This too is okay.
It’s okay to feel frustrated into improving your financial habits.
It’s okay to let shame cause you to save more money.
It’s okay to allow anxiety wean you off destructive borrowing habits.
It’s okay to let despair drive you to double or quadruple your income.
Disgust was the fuel that I used to turn my financial life around. I was 1 million % powered by it. Would I have preferred a gentler, kinder, positive fuel? Absolutely, yes. Who wants to feel like s%#@ while making boss moves?
But it was the only fuel that I had.
And so I took it, and I used it, and it turns out that it was good enough. It got the job done.
It was not the ideal, but it was the available.
I meet a lot of people who are restless, frustrated, tired, bitter, burnt out, desperate, afraid, ashamed of their financial life. All negative fuel. I see a lot of this, particularly when most people begin to realise that hard work may not necessarily make you rich.
That you can work hard and die broke, unless you know how to work with money.
That being around money is not the same as having it, unless you know how to work with money.
I think these negative emotions are valid. What I don’t see enough of is people turning them into real gasoline that drives them to their financial destination.
To anyone who is in this position, or knows someone in this position, please know this:
You can start badly and still finish well.
That moment when you realise you don’t have the security and comfort that you thought lived at the end of a university certificate and 40-year office job - that is a groundbreaking moment.
But it is not life-changing.
What is life-changing, is the moment you realise that this realisation is not by chance. That whatever negative emotion you are feeling is the fuel you need to drive you to your financial destination; to power you to the security that you deserve.
“The Wound is where
the Light enters you.”
Rumi
Here’s to you. To negative fuel and positive outcomes.